Managing Procrastivity: A Simple Guide for ADHD Women

As an ADHD woman, you might find yourself often putting off important tasks by doing something else that feels productive but is perhaps less urgent and important. This is known as procrastivity—avoiding a high-priority task by doing a less urgent, but still useful, task. Procrastivity can make you feel like you're getting things done, but it often leads to stress when the important task remains unfinished. Don’t worry; you're not alone in this. Let’s explore some simple strategies to help you understand and manage procrastivity with self-compassion and practical accommodations.

What is Procrastivity?

Procrastivity is a specific form of procrastination where you avoid a more important task by doing a less important one that still feels productive. For example, you might decide to clean out your email inbox or reorganize your closet instead of writing a report that's due soon. While these tasks are useful, they are not the priority.

Procrastivity can give you a false sense of productivity because you are completing tasks. However, it can also lead to guilt or stress when the higher-priority task is left undone.

Why Do We Use Procrastivity?

Procrastivity happens because some tasks feel easier and less overwhelming than others. ADHD women often choose procrastivity tasks because these tasks are:

• Manual: They involve physical actions, like cleaning or organizing, which can be less mentally taxing and provide a sense of tangible progress.
• Have Clear Steps: They are straightforward and provide a clear sense of direction and completion, making them feel more manageable.
• Have Start and Stop Times: They have a defined beginning and end, which reduces the feeling of being overwhelmed by an open-ended task.

These characteristics make procrastivity tasks feel more approachable and satisfying than more complex or demanding tasks.

Tasks We Tend to Procrastinate On

In contrast, ADHD women tend to procrastinate on tasks that are:

• Broad or Overwhelming: Large tasks without clear steps can feel daunting and hard to start.
• Lack Clear Start/Stop Points: Tasks without a defined beginning or end can be difficult to approach.
• Require High Cognitive Load: Tasks that need intense focus or mental effort can be intimidating and tiring.
• Are Emotionally Overwhelming: Tasks tied to high stakes or strong emotions, like writing a challenging report or preparing for a presentation, can trigger feelings of anxiety or fear.

Understanding why certain tasks feel more challenging can help you create strategies to manage them more effectively.

Strategies to Help You Manage Procrastivity

Here are some simple and steps to help you shift from procrastivity to productive task management:

1. Break Down Big Tasks into Smaller Steps
   • Why This Helps: Breaking down tasks makes them feel less overwhelming and more manageable. Instead of facing a big, vague task, you create a series of smaller, achievable steps.
   • How to Do It: Take a large task that feels overwhelming and break it into smaller, manageable parts. For example, instead of “write a report,” break it down into:
     • Create an outline.
     • Write the introduction.
     • Find and organize data.
     • Write one section at a time.
   • Be Kind to Yourself: If a step still feels too big, break it down further. It's okay to start with tiny steps if that's what helps you get going.
2. Make the Task More Manual or Physical
   • Why This Helps: Engaging with a task physically can make it feel more real and less abstract, which is often easier for the ADHD brain to handle.
     • How to Do It: If possible, turn a task into something physical. For example, if you need to organize information, print out documents and physically sort them. If you need to brainstorm ideas, write them on sticky notes and arrange them on a wall.
     • Self-Compassion Tip: Recognize that it’s okay to need physical engagement with a task. You’re not “wrong” for needing a different approach; you’re just accommodating how your brain works best.
3. Set Clear Boundaries and Limits
   • Why This Helps: Setting boundaries makes tasks feel more contained and less daunting, which can reduce feelings of overwhelm.
   • How to Do It: Use time boundaries, like “I will work on this task for 15 minutes,” or task boundaries, like “I will complete this small section before lunch.”
   • Be Gentle with Yourself: If you struggle to stick to these limits, that's okay. Adjust them as needed—maybe try 5 minutes instead of 15. The goal is to build a habit, not to be perfect.
4. Move From Thinking to Doing
   • Why This Helps: Getting started is often the hardest part. Starting with the smallest, most actionable step can help overcome the inertia.
   • How to Do It: Begin with the simplest action that requires physical movement, like opening a document, writing one sentence, or gathering your materials. This breaks the cycle of overthinking and gets you moving.
   •  Celebrate the small starts. Even a tiny step forward is still progress. Don’t minimize your efforts!
5. Use Visual Tools and Cues
   • Why This Helps: Visual aids help make abstract tasks concrete, which can make them feel less overwhelming and more manageable.
   • How to Do It: Create a visual list or flowchart of steps to complete the task. Use sticky notes, a whiteboard, or a digital tool to map out your plan. Seeing your progress visually can be motivating.
6. Leave Yourself Clues to Keep Going
   • Why This Helps: When you stop a task, it can be hard to remember where you left off, which can create resistance to restarting. Leaving clues helps you pick up right where you left off.
   • How to Do It: Before stopping work on a task, jot down a quick note or set a reminder for where you left off and what needs to happen next. This reduces the mental effort required to restart.
   • It’s okay to need reminders. Your brain needs support, and setting these up is a smart way to give yourself a boost.
7. Connect to Your Motivation
   • Why This Helps: Understanding the personal value or reward tied to a task can increase motivation, especially when the immediate benefit isn’t obvious.
   • How to Do It: Remind yourself why the task is important. Visualize the benefits of completing it, like the relief and satisfaction you’ll feel. Think about past experiences when you completed a similar task and felt good about it.
   • Practice Self-Compassion: If you’re struggling to connect with your motivation, it’s okay. Motivation isn’t always easy to find. Be patient with yourself and keep trying different strategies.
8. Reward Yourself Along the Way
   • Why This Helps: ADHD brains are more motivated by immediate rewards. Rewarding yourself for small accomplishments keeps motivation high and makes tasks feel more manageable.
   • How to Do It: Don’t wait until the end to celebrate. Give yourself small rewards for completing parts of the task, like a short break, a treat, or a favorite activity.
   • Accommodate Yourself: Choose rewards that truly feel like a treat for you. It’s okay to need external motivation—find what feels rewarding for you.
9. Plan for Continuity
   • Why This Helps: For bigger projects, having a consistent schedule prevents tasks from becoming overwhelming and keeps you on track.
   • How to Do It: Schedule regular time slots in your calendar to work on the task. Set reminders to help you remember these appointments with yourself.
   • Self-Compassion Tip: If you miss a scheduled time, don’t beat yourself up. Reschedule and try again. Consistency builds over time.
10. Use Emotional and Motivational Tools
    • Why This Helps: If a task feels emotionally overwhelming,use coping skills to help you when you start to feel discouraged or disregulated
    • How to Do It: Develop a list of go-to strategies that help you when emotions are high. This might include deep breathing exercises, calling a friend for support, or  going for a walk.
    • Practice Self-Compassion: It’s okay to feel anxious or overwhelmed. These feelings are valid, you are often asked to do things that are overwhelming for your brain without the necessary support.
11.  Embrace and Manage Discomfort

Why This Helps: Some tasks won’t feel comfortable, and that’s normal. Recognizing that discomfort is part of growth can help you push through, but it’s also important to know your limits. Don’t push yourself to the point of harm—understand when stress is too much and it’s time to pause.

How to Do It: When a task feels tough, remind yourself, “This doesn’t feel great, but I can handle it.” Watch for signs of overwhelming stress, like a racing heart or mental exhaustion. If you notice these, take a break.

Self-Compassion Tip: Discomfort is okay—it means you’re growing. But also know when to stop and care for yourself. Taking breaks shows self-awareness and strength, not weakness.

12. Reflect on Your Patterns

• Why This Helps: Understanding your patterns helps you identify which tasks trigger procrastivity and why. This insight can help you choose more effective strategies moving forward.
• How to Do It: Take a moment to write down what kinds of tasks you procrastinate on and why. Look for patterns in your behavior and think about what might help you address these.
• Accommodate Yourself: Use this reflection as a tool, not a weapon. It’s about understanding and supporting yourself, not judging or criticizing.