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Do you ever feel like you're living someone else’s life? 😟 Constantly chasing goals that society or others have set for you, but never feeling truly fulfilled? As a woman with ADHD, this struggle can be even more pronounced. The good news is, there's a way to break free from this cycle and start living a life that genuinely aligns with who you are. It's called values work.
What is Values Work?
Values work involves identifying and understanding your core values – the things that truly matter to you deep down. These aren't the values imposed by family, friends, or society, but your own unique guiding principles. By focusing on what you genuinely care about, you can set and pursue goals that bring real satisfaction and joy.
Why is Values Work Important for Women with ADHD?
Women with ADHD often feel pressured to conform to neurotypical standards, which can lead to frustration, low self-esteem, and a sense of failure. Values work helps by:
- Boosting Motivation: When your goals align with your values, you're naturally more motivated to achieve them.
- Increasing Self-Confidence: Knowing and staying true to your values builds self-trust and confidence.
- Enhancing Life Satisfaction: Living according to your values leads to a more fulfilling and less stressful life.
Discovering Your Core Values
Here are some steps and tools to help you uncover your true priorities and goals:
1. Values Inventory
Take some time to reflect on what matters most to you. Consider using a Values Questionnaire to get started. This can help clarify your core values and reveal where you might be compromising or shortchanging yourself.
2. Core Values: The Bullseye Form
The Bullseye Form is a fantastic tool to assess how well you're living according to your values in different life domains. It divides your life into:
- Work/Education
- Leisure/Recreation
- Relationships
- Personal Growth/Health
By evaluating these areas, you can pinpoint where you need to focus your efforts to better align with your values.
3. Write a Personal Mission Statement
Crafting a personal mission statement, similar to those used by successful businesses, can help you keep your life's mission clear and aligned with your values. Steven Covey's website offers a free tool to create your own personal mission statement here.
4. Write Your Own Eulogy
This might sound a bit morbid, but writing your own eulogy can provide profound insights into what you want your life to stand for. It encourages you to think about the legacy you want to leave and helps you align your daily actions with your deepest values.
Proceed with caution: Ensure this exercise focuses on your values and not on seeking validation from others. Bonnie Ware, who wrote "The Top Five Regrets of the Dying," noted that a common regret is not having the courage to live a life true to oneself.
How Values Work Can Transform Your Life
Aligning your actions with your core values can give you the courage to face anxiety and depression head-on. It provides the momentum needed to make tough choices and to discard goals that don't serve you. Many people find that once they align their lives with their values, they experience a profound sense of happiness and fulfillment.
Tools to Help You Get Started
- The Values_Questionnaire Start by understanding your core values.values List
- and The List of Values
- The Bullseye Form Evaluates how aligned your current life is with your values.
- Clarify your life's mission with a personal mission statement
- Write Your Own Eulogy: Gain insights into what truly matters to you.
Final Thoughts
Living a life that is true to your values isn't always easy, but it's incredibly rewarding. By identifying what truly matters to you and aligning your actions with these values, you can create a life that is not only fulfilling but also uniquely yours.
Recommended Reads
- ADHD and Finding a Job You Love: Discover how to align your career with your values.
- ADHD and Self-Esteem: Boost your confidence by staying true to yourself.
- ADHD and Confidence in Women: Here's How to Increase It: Practical tips to build self-confidence.
- ADHD and Worry: Five Ways to Worry Less and Enjoy Life More: Strategies to reduce anxiety.
- Creating an ADHD Supportive Workplace for Women: Tips for a more supportive work environment.
Note: The information provided here is for educational purposes and should not substitute for professional advice.
FAQs
1. What is the best way to start values work? Start by using a values questionnaire to identify your core values. Reflect on what truly matters to you and where you might be compromising.
2. How can values work help with ADHD? Values work can boost motivation, increase self-confidence, and enhance life satisfaction by aligning your actions with your true values.
3. Is writing a personal mission statement necessary? While not necessary, writing a personal mission statement can help you keep your life's mission clear and aligned with your values.
4. Can values work reduce anxiety and depression? Aligning your actions with your core values can provide the momentum needed to face anxiety and depression head-on, leading to a more fulfilling life.
5. How often should I reassess my values? It's a good idea to reassess your values periodically, especially during major life changes or when you feel out of alignment with your goals.
Note: The information provided here is for educational purposes and should not substitute for professional advice.
Medical information obtained from this website is not intended as a substitute for professional care. If you have or suspect you have a problem, you should consult a healthcare provider.
